I can’t say that I pictured myself as a blogger. I considered it at various points in my life. As a marathon runner, I envisioned creating a running blog to share my experiences with training, traveling, and eating. When I came out as transgender, I considered documenting that experience, too. I never followed through with these ideas. This year, I signed my first publishing contract for a LGBTQ+ romance novel, and here I am starting my own author’s blog. I am a writer because writers write. My lifelong dream involves becoming a successful novelist, which has been a never-ending burning desire in me since I was 9-years old. I wrote my first novel at 20-years old while working on my bachelor’s degree; however, I never pursued publication. It morphed into one of those dreams that I promised I would “get to” someday. Then one day in my late 20s, I sat down in front of my computer and attempted to write something. I blanked. Composing each sentence was a chore, no longer producing the flow and delight as it did when I was younger. Disillusioned, I assumed that I lost the talent and drive for it. I stopped writing fiction.
After earning my Ph.D., I became engulfed in the world of academic writing and managed to publish a few articles in academic journals. It gave me a sense of writing success, but not enough to count as getting published. Afterall, not many people read academic articles unless they are academics or in school. I wanted a larger audience, and I wanted to write from my heart.
After coming out as transgender, I felt the urge to write a memoir; however, I later decided that I would feel more comfortable writing about my experiences through fictional characters. Thus, I wrote a fictional queer romance portraying young adult characters (New Adult genre) undergoing gender and sexuality identity issues. The writer in me came alive again! Writing this novel helped me express and process the development of my gender identity and sexuality; it also helped me process my husband’s acceptance of his sexuality. One character is transgender whose experiences are based on my own, and the other is a cisgender man who comes to terms with his bisexuality after falling in love with a man. My husband married me presenting as a woman, and he stayed with me after transitioning to transmasculine, but he wasn’t always comfortable with bisexuality and ultimately learned that love is love. Like my character, my husband underwent his own sexual exploration. My other posts will convey some more about both our journeys.
So here I am! I started this blog as a recommendation from my publisher to promote my novel (and future ones!). However, I decided that this blog was only going to be meaningful for me if I wrote about real, raw experiences. Even though this blog was originally created as an author’s blog, since my fictional works will continue to convey stories around LGBTQIA+ identities, this blog is mostly devoted to my personal experiences as a queer person.
My experiences are not meant to represent everyone’s in the LGBTQIA+ community. These are ONLY my personal accounts. Some readers may find my blogs helpful; others may not. This blog is also a space for me to share my honest, convoluted, and nuanced conflicts around my identity. I am not perfect and have no desire to hide behind a façade of perfection. It’s complicated! If gender and sexuality are complicated for you, you are not alone here! Three years into transitioning, I am still learning about who I am and struggling with what our society labels as masculine and feminine. In fact, I am starting to abhor those labels in many ways but still find myself using them to explain aspects of my identity to others. Thus, I am hoping that this blog becomes a safe space for me to explore these identities while also providing experiences that others may find helpful in understanding themselves or others. I know my views may clash with other people’s ideas, but we are, after all, a diverse community.
I hope you enjoy my posts, and my novels (when they are released)! Feel free to also follow me on Instagram and Twitter.
Writing your own blog? Please share the link with me! Let’s support each other!